Wednesday, April 29, 2020

29 April 2020 - The COVID-19 List


- My wife and I are right at 2 months of sheltering at home. At times it is almost blissful; we love each other, our marriage is a good one, we can still make each other laugh.

- Sometimes one of us will break down. Maybe it was the latest update of deaths, or maybe the talk of death takes one of us, or both of us, back to the grief of losing our youngest son at age 25, just 3 years ago. Sometimes it just happens. No reason needed.

- We both miss going to church, the movies, the coffee shops and cafes, getting our hair cut. My wife misses shopping; I detest shopping. But my God! My poetry readings! Holy crap.

- My wife, Alex (Alexandra, really), has a serious mobility issue. I'll spare you the details, but her right ankle is weak, and most of the time it is in one of those boots to immobilize it. Around the house she uses my old walker from when I had vertigo real bad, two summers ago. Standing and walking are both painful. I have become the de facto cook, laundry man, and errand boy. Right ankle; she can't drive. 

- I worry about catching the bug when I get groceries, which the only reason I go out. Who will care for her if I fall ill? Who will cook her meals, see that her clothes are clean, her sheets, her towels? How would it be for her, losing both a child and a husband?

- When my son died, I wanted to die, too. It was my first thought when the cop gave me the news. Then I had to go tell my wife. When she broke down, I knew I had to stay. I could not let her down. I handled things. The police, the coroner, the organ donation, the cremation. He lived in a different city than us, about a 3 hour drive away. We had to go pick up his ashes. Two things saw me through, my Zen practice, in particular, mindfulness, and the fact that she needed me. Later I added some counseling and an antidepressant.

- My own mobility isn't so great, osteoarthritis in my knees, especially bad in the left one. When we walk together, if I am on the right we look like a very slow entry in the three-legged race.

- Alex got sick early, so we sheltered early. It seems to have been a regular flu, but who knows. You have be important or near death to get tested in America. We started playing a little Rummy everyday. Now we're both Rummy sharks and we're playing a penny a point. She owes me several dollars. Maybe we should make it a nickel a point.

- We braved a plant sale out a farm, masks and keeping a distance, and we're putting in a small garden. It feels good. I do little yard work when my knee lets me. I'm way behind.

-COVID-19 has not an affected my writing routine in the least.

James Lee Jobe



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